Following the tale...

I figured, since I liked the last entry I shared with you guys from Ella's journal, I'd do a few more, just for y'all. [No laughing, crying or complaing.] Here is the enrty that follows the one I showed you in the pervious post. [Dreamer to dreamer. ]

"I never see myself as normal, not at all. But as I examine myself in the mirror sometimes I began to see the traces of a normal, teenage girl, with curly hair, brown eyes and a golden complexion. Just your average girl, still.

I don't know why, but it's true, I see myself as different from the rest of the world. I don't see myself as a regular teenager girl obsessing with looks, but deep down I know I am. As I watch my actions I realize the girl, who I once thought was unique and different, is actually the same as those around her. She's human. Plain old human.

As you can tell, my tedious quest to grasp something new and exciting has yet to come to a end, but I haven't given up hope that I will find what my heart aches for.

As I lay reading last night I stumbled upon something; my writing.

I've always been aware of my writing, since I spend most of my time typing away, coming up with new ideas, one after another. But never have I realize the effect my writing could have on me, a longing soul. As I began to read a story I had weaved, not too long ago, and I wasn't even three pages in when a new thought, bold and bright, socked me in the stomach. I thought to giggle but then, thinking better of it, kept my mouth shut. No use drawing attention to my self.

This idea, this amazing, mind-blowing idea was as simple as can be. It doesn't make sense, what I just said, but the truth is I don't care; you'll understand me in some way, some day.

Anyway, this thought, this one amazing thought was this; my stories can be the answers to my dreams. Through my stories I can live the life I've always wanted. I know I've said this before, in some fashion, but this time I mean that my desire to have a extraordinary life can be fulfilled in my stories!

How lovely it is to know that I, Ella, can weave stories and great tales and live them myself! Every tale the comes from with in me has been lived by me already! My my longing be put to rest!

I have, finally, found my escape. No more sorrow of wishful thinking, yet triumph in the stories I weave" 

-Ella Bententon-

Love to you all,
Lia.